Idols… The Top Three

Unless you have been living in either a pre-historic or Afghan cave for the last few weeks, three names: Trinah, Eric and Nicolette have meant something every week. They have been slugging it out in the Idols Top Ten. How ironic that the initials Trinah, Eric and Nicolette spell out the word Ten! It was all in the stars.

Yes, the TV show that has had a fair share of suspense, drama, unpredictability, excitement, hysteria and… Cynthia was on its second last show and the Top Three lined up to sing three songs each!

First off, the anagrams of the Top 3. Eric Moyo has been serenading all with his performances but whilst he melts hearts, he is ‘Icy Romeo.’ Trinah Chisanga has the singing tone that caresses the ear and she comes out as a gem which is why she is ‘Ah! Shining Carat’. Nicolette Kiiga is the Miss Congeniality of the show but her anagram is ‘Ego Like Titanic!’

Well, here was hoping that the Titanic will not sink! The song to be sung were not drawn from lots but by the formula of the Idols own pick followed by the Fans Choice and then the Judges selection.

Lebo, the Presenter Who Looks Like He Is Selling You An Umbrella When It Is Raining, opens the routine with the usual hyperbole about people having lived in a cave. Oops! Kettle, Pot, Black etc etc. I started the blog the same way! As Lebo appears on stage, the girls start to prematurely salivate leading to decibels of noise that the scientific boffins are still trying to calculate.

Kawesa, the Judge Who Is As Unpopular As The Forty Bob Coin, is introduced looking all magisterial. The Top T.E.N must be waiting with delight on his words at the end of the show. Barring any unmitigated voter concurrence, Kawesa’s views will remain more wrong than controversial. If you ask me, the oxygen-poor air is clouding Kawesa’s judgement in that booth.

TK, the Judge Who Shouts After Each Performance, is looking great and trying to memorize the sentence: Must not say the words ‘You Know What’ before I make my comments tonight. You know what, place your bets with him now! You know what, just forget it.

Angela, the Judge Who Finds Shoes, Eric and Clothes Irresistible, is looking irresistible herself with the hat ensemble. Double A must be carrying a thermometer for she recently told us how the temperature around her had been raised when Nikki winked at TK.

Scar, The Judge Who Elicits More Pain With His Jabs Than A Roadside Dentist, is looking funky. He could be the CEO of the Idols version of Apprentice but most neutrals watching are hoping that the underdog is not on his firing line tonight.

Nicolette starts the triple classic with the Kelly Clarkson hit ‘Anytime’ which she delivered with a look of frightening trepidation. Maybe we should again blame Scar for this one. He told her last time to believe her own hype. It was a sad opening to the show. Loved the white pants though.

Trinah was next up trying to step in the shoes of Aretha Franklin with the song ‘Natural Woman’. Now we all remember that the good man Edwin Kgaswane of Botswana sang this song during the auditions. That audition was my coffee spluttering moment. Trinah’s version was mellow, lovely and natural.

Football-loving Eric came through his challenge of Whacko Jacko’s bi-racial theme song without even wearing a Newcastle United jersey with Black And White stripes but a shirt that was close. The crowd loved the experiment. For his next challenge, I bet Eric will place frozen butter on the judges table and do any song. The butter will melt.

Nicolette agonizingly went through the next song which was Faith Hill’s ‘The Way You Love Me’ in a seated position. Speaking of sitting, it was as if she had sat out this whole round. The bad news is that she does, after all, have a future at Broadway.

Trinah has been placed on the pedestal by some of the Judges and it was quite appropriate that she started out her second song on the high chair, which was not quite the pedestal. Finally she put on some cool threads this round as she sang ‘Put Your Records On’. A classic… is a classic… is a classic and Corinne Bailey Rae would still love this version.

Eric was battling a cold but you would have never noticed by how he sang the second song originally done by Seal. Eric may have sang ‘Kiss From A Rose’ but when he finished, kisses were blown at him by all the girls. Kiss From A Monica, Kiss From A Naomi, Kiss From A Rita, Kiss From A Winnie and of course, Kiss From Angela.

Nikki was hoping to ‘Save The Best For Last’. The trouble with saving the best for last, is that sometimes, you get caught up by the Sell By Date. She rendered the Vanessa Williams hit quite well and the thought that came to my mind was: Is there no limit to this girl’s escapology? She may have left it too late.

‘I Believe’ that Trinah brought out all the emotion including tears in her Fantasia song that came up next. I loved it. Even without playing some tricks like sprinkling some dust on the stage, she still sounded magical and on course to win the 80,000 beans.

The one who would stop her is, of course, Eric who ended the night by stopping the sun on its tracks with ‘Don’t Let The Sun Go Down On Me’. He may have just lost his voice, but Angela lost her mind a long time ago. If Eric had pretended to walk his dog on stage, the girls would still have cheered and Angie would have still said: He walked the dog in style!

Scar conceded that Eric was the coolest dressed man; Kawesa committed his usual careless remarks stating that either Trinah or Nicolette would be going home. A truer statement, but also, blatantly false. Because only one contestant on the night was like the granny who keeps popping around for Christmas. Her smell just lingers onto the New Year. But surely not to the Finale in July.